What did the fat lady order at McDonalds? Nothing because she forgot here wallet at home.

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Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

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A man is taking a shower in jail where he drops the soap. He proceeds to pick the soap up and cleans the rest of his body, puts his orange jumpsuit on and returns to his cell.

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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An innocent man's home was raided by police, who accused him of grand theft auto. It turns out it was just a case of mistaken identity.

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What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

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So a man walks into a bar and gets a drink, then a man walks up to him and tries to start a fight, the first man says, "No thanks" and walks home.

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the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

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What do you call a child that has been stabbed? A dead child

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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What do you call a man in Afghanistan? Either a scuicide bomber a soldier or a tep

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so your in a room with mickey mouse and the lights go off, how did the lights go off mickey mouse turned them off

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead are best friends and go shopping together.

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H o m o comes out as homo

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This is just like Facebook. If you guys want to like comments, or even comment on them, just get Facebook.

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Tim likes girls

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An old man walks across the street. Several cars start to honk in irritation, for they are in a hurry and the man is walking quite sluggishly.

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can the real slim shady please stand up? no. there is a slim shady in all of us, so we will all stand up.

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Have you read Shakespeare? Dunno. Who wrote it? Shakespeare.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs sitting on a doorstep? Whatever his name happens to be

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What do you call a white hankerchief dipped into the red sea? Wet.

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How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb? None. They are blind and do not care if it is light or dark in their surroundings.

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How do you blindfold an Asian person? Take a price of cloth and put it over his eyes

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Why was the lady afraid of cooking? Because her husband always beat her with a frying pan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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