Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

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I have aids

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and shitty? A bootleg stick.

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Why did the boy drown? Because he was actually a brick. I lied about him being a boy.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. my Mom is a hooker.

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Why's Jeds head so big? Curley wurly.

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Columbine Massacre

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Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

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q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

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So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Why did the women die? Because She was a Squirrel.

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What's black, white, and can't turn around in a phone booth? A nun with a javelin through her chest.

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Q: What did Mr. Spoke say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

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A man died in a sky-diving accident. What was the last thing that went through his mind before he died? His feet

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Q: What do you do when the light burns out A: Just replace it with a bulb from a less used room

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Person A said: Knock Knock! Person B could not answer the door as he could not hear Person A's announcement of his or her arrival.

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Q.-What's the difference between broccoli and a dead moose? A.-Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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