why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

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If everyone in China jumped up and down at the same time they would lose all credibility as a nation for organising such a pointless excursion.

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Why did Sally fall off a tree? The tree was a man wearing a tree costume and was sexually assaulting her with his branches. Sally fell off because the cops came and the man threw her down. The tree man is still on the loose. If you have any info please call crime stoppers.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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ugvvvvvv

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if a fat guy in a red suit comes into your house on christmas. its not santa your about to get raped from chewy(:

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A boy owned a dog that was uncommonly shaggy. Many people remarked upon its considerable shagginess. When the boy learned that there are contests for shaggy dogs, he entered his dog. The dog won first prize for shagginess in both the local and the regional competitions. The boy entered the dog in ever-larger contests, until finally he entered it in the world championship for shaggy dogs. But the day before the championship the dog died.

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What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

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What did the man with a colostomy bag say after his home was destroyed in a fire? At least all my shit’s in one place.

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Trump will make America great again.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's usually in a good mood.

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What's worse than farting in front of your boyfriend? Farting on your boyfriends pillow and giving him pink eye.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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What did the man say to the prostitute? Can I pay you to come with me to a cheap motel and partake in sexual intercourse with me?

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Q: what is the best way to pick up jewish chicks. A: with a pickup line and possibly a gift such as chocolates or flowers

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YOU'VE WON A FREE IPAD!!!!! PRESS CTRL+W TO CLAIM YOUR PRIZE!

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Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

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Two cows are standing in a field. One says to the other, 'Have you heard about this mad cow disease?' and the other says 'Good thing we're penguins.'

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what do you call an evening with richard? a waste of time

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Why do mexicans like burritos? Because they taste good.

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How many ADD kids does it take to screw...

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Did you know him? Why the anonymous tip?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

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your sister has 1 boob thats funny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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