"what did the priest say to the rabbi?" "what" "my religions better

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What did Charlie do when he lost his golden ticket? He killed his grandpa to get it back.

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Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

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To men walk into a bar. One says to a paying customer, "Mind if I sit here?" and the other man inquires the bartender about so.e fancy drink that takes five minutes to prepare. After 23 minutes, naturally, they left at exactly the same time and they went home to their wife and kids. They both share a wife and kids.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He decided to sail to Portland. He cast off and was never seen again.

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what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

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Whats the difference between and ? Blue custard

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Why did the Old man die? He died of old age.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Right now I'm walking down a road shoot car rhendhhdgfgdyxchdhsggggggggggggggggggggggggg

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What did the pitcher say to the batter who hit the ball very far? Wow, you hit that ball very far.

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Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to the restroom and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. He goes to the restroom again and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. Guess what happens next? A. He goes to the restroom to urinate B. He buys another drink C. He flirts with a very attractive lady D. Goes home and masturbates

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How was Charles Manson able to get women to kill for him? Because he was charismatic and intelligent.

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There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

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800000000000000000?0?00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000?0000 I hate you

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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What's the difference between Obama and a monkey? They are two different species, so thus they are very different.

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A man invented a time machine that didn't work. Because he wasn't a scientist, he was an ice cream man.

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How many black babies fit in a garbage can? It depends on the capacity of the garbage can.

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Your mamma so jobless, that she needs a job! ~T.J.C.S.

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Q: What is Tarzan's favorite Christmas Carol? A: None. He was raised by gorillas, who are unlikely to have ever heard of Christmas.

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Why are all teachers stupid? They´re not. Why would you say that?

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Two Jews walk into a pub. They don't order a ham sandwich.

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Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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