As far as I know, the day after tomorrow is going to be YOUR lucky day, because you will be tasting sausage for the first time with your lower lips... No seriously, you cant be virgin, you can tell me the truth, you like 24 or something?

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A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

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Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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knock knock

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Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse replies: "my wife has terminal cancer."

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A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

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What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

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What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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One time i was sitting down

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

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No soup for you!

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You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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