Q:Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A:One less drunk

Why did the priest go to jail? He had sexual relations with young boys.

What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

Charles Manson is innocent.

What's the difference between cat and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other is a watermelon.

The adventures of HAROLD THE MONGOOSE: Harry dug a hole. He did not like that hole so he dug a new one. He liked that hole so he did not dig another one. Harry slept on a rock. He did not like that rock. So he smashed it with a ham. Harry found a new rock. He liked that rock so he didn't smash it with a ham. Harry ate a snake. He did not like that snake so he regurgitated it. Harry ate another snake. He liked that snake so he did not regurgitate it. Harry encountered a bush. He did not like that bush. Unfourtianately for Harry, that Bush became president.

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

You know what it means when a priest lays his watch down on a podium? Absolutely nothing

Two penguins walk are in the bathtub and says "can you pass me the soap?" the other one looks at him quite quarly and says "what do you think i am, a chainsaw?!?"

The chicken crossed the road.

What did the white boy say to the black boy? You're black

Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

What do you call a bear. Rob.

You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

Roses are Red Your Face Has Turned Blue This Pillow I have Is Smothering You

Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

Sprechen zie deutsche? nein!

What do old people break when they fight? A sweat

Roses are red violets are blue I'm black give me money

what did the bartender say to the customer? a. is it the first option b. is it the second option c. is it the third option.

99% of teenagers would cry if they saw justin bieber on the top of a skyscraper, about to jump. However, there is 1% who would be sitting in a lawn chair at the bottom screaming, DO A BACKFLIP!!!

A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? the black man

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

i was born with 99 medical problems, and the difficulty to count till 100.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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