What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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Why did Santa get stuck up a chimney? Because there was a family of possums living up there. They ripped his face off.

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? -Who's there? Not the girl.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's orange and sticky? An orange. What's red and sticky? My stool - is that normal?

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There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Seven was black

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Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the boy loose his glass with milk? He got hit by a bus.

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What's worse than watching the Hunger Games? Playing the Hunger Games

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Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

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Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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What does a black man do when drives up to a STOP sign? Stops.

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What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust? What's worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The loss of originality in anti joke formats. And hypocrisy.

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Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

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Why was the black guy so good at basketball? Because he practiced.

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What happened to the girl that thought she was a mermaid? She drowned, humans can't breathe under water.

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How do you make a baby cry ? Throw a brick at his face

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How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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