what did the chicken say to the other chicken? nothing, they dont talk.

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If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, then they probably won't hear the lumberjack's cries for help either.

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bish bash bosh giz a nosh

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WHO LET THE DOGS OUT?!?!?!!! Not Michael Vick.

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Why couldn't the man open his car door for the women? He drove a jeep with removable doors

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How do you make your mom mad? Burn down the house and eat the dog.

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what do you find at the top of mountains? things

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How do you confuse a blonde? Wait...what?

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Why did the chicken crossed yo mama? Because your moms a man and your birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory.

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knock knock whose there the hospital staff your mom just died of AIDS

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What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

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Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

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What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

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If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

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Your mother is so fat, that if she had 8 clones of her, they would probably not be able to stand in the elevator together due to the maximum capacity, and safety hazard.

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A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why was the boy laughing? Because

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb boy get for Christmas? Cancer

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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A man had come into a bar. No wait, it was a horse. A man had come into a horse.

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A woman sees a sign on a store that says "husbands for sale." Curious, she walks inside. The clerk says "These men will be perfect husbands, they'll cook and clean for you and see to your every need." Shocked, the woman calls the police and reports the store for human trafficking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops