Roses are red, Violets are blue. Before you sneeze Say PIK-Achoo

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My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

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What's worse than the haulocost? Not much.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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A black guy wearing a mask runs into a store, points his gun at the cashier, steals some money and runs out. The police start an investigation the following morning

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What's worse than finding 16 dead babies in a tree? Finding 1 dead baby in 16 trees.

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I have aids

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What did the little girl with no legs or arms get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock knock? Who's there? Not that little girl.

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How do you ask a blonde out to dinner? Politely

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What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

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What do you say when your hot chocolate is to hot? This hot chocolate is too hot.

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Why was the lady afraid of rocks? Because her husband was stoned.

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My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

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What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

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Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

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Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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a black man has a shotgun. having an IQ of 11 he shot his hands off

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whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

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what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

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What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops