What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

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Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

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What do you call a Mexican hot dog? Lunch.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Why can't you get a bull to talk? Because it felt like beating the shit out of you and mounting you.

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Q. What do you call a Widow's Husband? A. Dead...

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What's worse than getting struck by lightning? Getting struck while your in your house!!

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Why was the little boy sad Because he has depression from his father beating him over and over every time he comes home from school...

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A guy comes home from work every day to his wife, who always seems miserable. He decides that her unhappiness is making him unhappy aswell, so he sits her down to talk things over. It turns out she is depressed because she can't get a job and the back wheels of her wheelchair are rusting.

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Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

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Felix? The Lucky cat? That is the only thing that comes to mind, I am dead tired, but I really don't mind staying up until I cant anymore physically, as for mentally I am getting pretty bad as for company.

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A seal walks into a club. The man proceeds to skin it and sell the fur for profit.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A katon.

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Why do fat people make such good slaves? They're too fat and lazy to escape. Unfortunately, if you want your slave to be fat, you actually have to feed it properly.

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Why couldnt the girl ride her bike? becuase she was dreaming she actually doesnt have a bike her family is poor in these hard economic times.

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A blonde girl walks into a car.

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

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Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

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Only in your math books can Carlos buy 14 cantaloupes without hus sanity being questioned.

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What's black and white and in the desert? Tourists being held hostage by a tribe.

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What do we call Osama? Osama

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So a jew walks into a bar!

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João Duarte reads this.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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