Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

Why did the moose cross the road? Migration.

A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

Three mexicans walk into a bathroom they all had to go pee.

What do you call a mormon in a red jumpsuit covered in black spots? Proper terminology for this scenario has not been yet made

Did you hear about the guy in town living in a tyre, he got a puncture now hes living in a flat.

What did the horse say to the cow? Nothing because animals cannot speak.

Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Easter? A: Diabetes

Why was Hellen Keller blind and deaf? Because she was a girl.

what did god say when we made his first black person oops i acidenlty burnt it

why did the guy round second base? to get to 3rd

Why does everyone treat Jesus as some sort of saint for making five thousand people bread, when Hitler made six million people toast?

Hey man. what? squidbillies.

What do you call a guy with a bomb strapped to his chest flying a plane? A pilot with a bomb strapped to his chest

Thats what she said

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

Lol XD,now that is bad ass of you to say that, what about her, does she get to go around too?

What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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