Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Dandelions are yellow

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Why does the cow eat grass? A: Because it's green. (Cows are colorblind)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

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What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

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among liedbtt is my Captcha code

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Hey are you from tennessee? Because I recognize your accent and I grew up there also.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

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What do you call a man with no head? Nothing he has no ears.

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What did Helen Keller say when she fell into a well? Nothing. She died upon impact and her family mourned her death for years.

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what did the homeless man get for christmas hyperthermia

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kk

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do you know what was a good idea? not last night

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What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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women's rights

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Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

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Tim is a bald headed prick with an annoying voice and he looks like a clean shaven Walter White if he was on the same drugs that he was making and he looks like he smokes too much because the wrinkles on his forehead look like lips.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? -a black man that left his family

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What did the fan of Justin Beiber say? Nothing there are no fans.

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Q: Why do homeless people smell bad? A: Because they live on the street and they dont take showers it's very sad sometimes.

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Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

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What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops