Why did Sally fall off a tree? The tree was a man wearing a tree costume and was sexually assaulting her with his branches. Sally fell off because the cops came and the man threw her down. The tree man is still on the loose. If you have any info please call crime stoppers.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There were three men standing outside. They were enjoying the nice weather.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Pickles

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q:where does baby oil come from? A:Only the finest of babies

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the kid with all F's on his report card get? Beat by his parents

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are red violets are blue your dads got hair what happened to you

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did Moses make his tea? He steeped the tea leaves for around 5 minutes in hot water.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Joseph Fritzl.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call someone who explores wild cave systems? A spelunker.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the sock sad? Impossible. Socks dont have emotions.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Was in a coma, survived trough smoke and mirrors, and I had 3 separated sections of my order in order to test the efficiency of my words, united we are about 6.800.000 people. Excuse my anger below, I mean I was in a coma and ended up on some hard painkillers, and while I am still tapering down on a "totally medicinally safe" dosage of 20 mg valium its a bitch, even for a guy that enjoys a mild painkiller every now and then in order to focus. Excuse my excessive typing, its paincontrol vs the stress and all 64 side effects of valium. I am alive, and my followers know that, I do not mean to brag, but Neronism tends to end up fucked up when I am gone with people trying to live up to what only I can do apparently, so I decided it was time to mash the separate groups together... Btw, we live at point zero now, if you do not know where that is, I can inform you at later time. But be quick about it if you have more questions, we only chat on horsehead due the "discussed hours"

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I was just thinking in something I swear ... I am still Just, wait, i'll be good

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Person: kk Person1: did you just kk me? Person: no

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why did the baby fall out of the crib? it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what does matt daly like to do in his free time anal

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse, confused, looks at the bartender with a bewildered look, neighs loudly, and runs out of the bar knocking over a few tables and chares.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the boy say after smoking weed for the first time? -"I don't really feel anything" and his friends explained that is sometimes the case for a first time smoker.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops