What's worse than biting into a worm in your apple? Being run over by a stampede of elephants

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Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

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why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

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What did the duck say to the other duck? Something, But us humans don't speak there language to understand

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala.

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What is the worst place to be in race if you're racing with me Behind me

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What's the difference between a lion and a stuffed lion? One is for children to play with, one will eat you alive.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? Years of slavery.

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How do you make a black guy cry? You kill his family.

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Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

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Knock Knock Who's There Me

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by the ice cream van

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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While running away a burgular cut his hand on a piece of glass. He fell to the ground bleeding like crazy. What did the police say when he saw the burgular? You've been caught red handed.

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy wuzzy lost all his hair. Turns out he had brain cancer and died at age 30.

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What you do if you poo out a slug? Eat it.

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Why was girl happy on the day she found out she wasn't pregnant? -It was her birthday.

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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blonde: your cute Gangster: wanna go back to my crib blonde: you mean you can go back in time?

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Johns mother asked him were he had been. John simply replied the shop.

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops