Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

what is the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? you take your shoes off before you jump on the trampoline.

Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

Q: What used to be black, and then became white, and touches young boys? A: Michael Jackson.

Autism... is not funny at all, it is a serious issue in today's day and age and must be addressed and cured

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

A man finds a lamp in the desert. He picks it up and dusts it off. The lamp becomes cleaner.

A Jew walks into a bar, he buys it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

Roses are red, but there are also pink, white and yellow varieties Violets aren't blue, they're violet, hence the name I've got OCD And my poetry skills are also lacking.

WOMENS RIGHTS

Why did the boy fall off the zipline? He had no arms.

A blond Canadian and his Korean friend are going together to Korea. When checking in the person asks the Canadian if he has a return ticket leaving the country. He replies yes but he does not have it on him. According to Korean Customs and Immigration laws a non-Korean citizen must have a return ticket to enter the country. Inevitably follows a long and tedious process in order to procure the ticket in order to pass customs. The Korean and the Canadian continue to their boarding gate.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road A. Because he needed to get to the other side

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 went to a house party. 7 was there. 7 and 6 kind of new each other. They went to the same school, but weren`t really friends. All night 7 was giving 6 strange looks. 6 started feeling uneasy, so he left the party early. When 6 got in his car 7 was inside waiting for him and pulled out a gun. Luckily 6 got away from 7 safely, but has been scared of him ever since.

Q:what did the Aardvark say to the other Aardvark. A: nothing because Aardvark do not have the mental capacity to carry out basic conversations

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?” The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery. The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier. The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man says, “All right, all right. I’m *dying* to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?” The monks reply, “You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.” The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, “I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.” The monks reply, “Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.” The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is right behind that door.” The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, “Real funny. May I have the key?” The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door. The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst. Finally, the monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.” The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound. But I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk...

Why did the teacher ask her student about the test? Because she was in the hospital the day of the test because her husband was hit by a rail road spike and died but she was so devoted to her job she wanted to know.

person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

Ask me if i'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

A child walk's into a bar. And gets sexually abused.

Why was the boy walking in circles? One of his feet was nailed to the floor...

What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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