Bugs dance, so do ants, Oh my glob it’s Adventure Time!

Q:What's black, wrinkled and smells like raisins? A: A raisin.

Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

How do you drown a blonde. I recommend that you do not drown a blonde because it is a felony. You could face 30-35 years in prison.

A man walks into a bar. The force of the impact causes serious head trauma and kills him within a matter of minutes.

I do not want to know, you want to TELL ME so that I can increase the potency of the hypnotic suggestion by... Lets say... A number that if I said would work instantly? I wrote CONDOMS ARE FOR PUZZIES... Which kinda makes sense... Just a line, from the worst game ever.

What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should? Fly halfway across the world when the environment turns hostile.

you know its foggy outside when you step outside and its foggy outside.

A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

Sometimes I sit in the bath and pretend im a bubble

Quinn Grifith Randel lives in Roswell, GA

What's worse than dropping an ice-cream cone? A dead baby. What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies. What's worse than two dead babies? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping two ice-cream cones.

Why did the man fall off the cliff? I don't know, I have mental AIDS.

A princess kisses a frog to transform it into a prince.. She is soon arrested for committing bestiality

Why was the drunk man arrested? he beat his wife and was sentenced too 3 months in federal prison

What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

what is the difference of a bag of dead babies and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline

why did the jewish man die answer The hollucost

"Have you guys ever seen Derrek Ashmores sisters? They are DTF if you know what I mean" - Jesse Ziegenbein

So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

Guys, I think I'm gonna apply to join the Crips. My SAT score is a 2050, and their average score is a 2200. My GPA, however, is a 4.6, and their average is only a 4.2. Do you guys think that they will take me? Or should I try and apply for the Bloods?

What's the difference between a pizza and a girl? I've stuck my penis in a pizza

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...