Do you have ass-thma? Coz your ass is taking my breath away

9 Cats on a boat. One Jumped off, how many left? 8.

MAKE

A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

A blind man walks into a bar. It was a book shop.

Why was the Mexican stopped at the border? He forgot his passport.

A fat man walked into a hot dog.

when life gives you lemons your like wait how did i get these lemons??

What's the new green? Green

There are two muffins in an oven. Since they are inanimate objects, they do nothing but sit there and bake until they are a golden brown color, at which point a man takes them out of the oven and eats them for breakfast.

What did the boy skip rocks with? -A rock

What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

I literally died laughing

A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Yes.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

Why did the black man walk across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

Why couldn't the boy talk? He drowned.

What was the asian person's name? I don't know, I never met him.

You know what's gay? Grabbing another man's penis.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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