roses are red violets are twisted turn around bitch your about to get fisted

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What did the flower say to the flowerpot? Nice weather we're having

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I found someone on the ground who wasn't breathing and had no pulse.They must have been in a damn deep sleep.

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

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Why Didn't jeff go to school yesterday? He was dead.

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What did the potato say to the man It said nothing it is a potato

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The town was so small. The ferris wheel was green.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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What do you give hobos? Febreeze

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a dyslexic man walked his god.

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where would you find a blind man's car? exactly where he left it...

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How long does it take to acheive a superbowl win? However long it takes you.

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Yo mama so poor that she's having trouble making ends meet without government assistance.

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

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What's red, white and not blue. A Canadian flag

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How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh?

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Q:Whats 2+2? A: 4

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two japanese men walk into a bar. the first japanese man says “i am japanese!” the second japanese man says “i am also japanese!” the bartender then says “well, hey. i’m japanese too”. the bar was in japan.

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WNBA

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What's the difference between a jew and pizza? A Jew is human and pizza is food.

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What's small and doesn't turn girls on? A bottlecap.

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Whats big orange and likes to eat rocks? a big orange rock eater

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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