A man and a cucumber walk into a bar. They sit three seats away from each other and intermediately give nervous looks to one another. Finally the man stands up and declares "I hate bar jokes" and walks out.

Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

Knock knock Who's there Ted Bundy

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

Why did the sky turn gray? Yes because she thought it meant a quarterback.

What did the Cat get for Christmas? Nothing cats don't celebrate Christmas

What did the man get when he returned from Africa? AIDS

How did the rabbi die? It didnt it lived through the shooting

how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

why was the jewish boy afraid of ovens? because he developed an irrational fear of kitchen appliances. he would later, as an adult seek counseling and overcome his fear.

What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

Why did the fat kid fall of his bike? The skinny kid pushed him off!

What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

Why did the chicken crossed yo mama? Because your moms a man and your birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory.

knock knock whose there the hospital staff your mom just died of AIDS

If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

What's green and would kill you if it fell on you? A golf course

Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

what do you find at the top of mountains? things

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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