Your mother is so heavy that she decided to try out nutrisystem

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I didn't use protection So here's your baby

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One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

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Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

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Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

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what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

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You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

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why did the titanic sink, it was hit by a iceberg

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

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Jellybeans

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Knock Knock The door's open, wipe your shoes off on the matt

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

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Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

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roses are red violets are blue some poems are good and some don't

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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