A cheetah walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve re cheetah, as cheetahs are an endangered species and does not want to risk the cheetah succumbing to alcohol poisoning.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The UPS guy dumb ass

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He actually planned to visit his family on the other side, but unfortunately he did not look both ways so was involved in a terrible car accident. His family now mourns their loss.

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Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

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What did ahmet say to adem...? LEMME SUCK ON THOSE TITS joke made by dark

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What Batman said to Robin before they got in the car? -Get in the car Robin!

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Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

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Why did the man sit on the chair? Because he was tired of standing

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Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed all of six's family

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A man walks into a vagina. The man, expecting a holiday inn, is very confused, and later gets mauled by five bears, who mistook his scent for a fish.

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How did the black kid apply for college? The Common App. Duhh

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Why does Joel's breathe smell?

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Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

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How many cows does it take to screw in a light bulb? Either one super cow or none because cows don't even have apposable thumbs

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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Gordon Brown smiles.

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What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

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You know whats worse than finding a fly in your soup? 9/11

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Why did the chicken cross the road!? He was supposed to be dead! You are by far the most incompetent chicken assassin we've ever had. You're fired.

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What if I told you.....potatoe

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Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

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What do you call it when a black man kills an Asian man? Murder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops