Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

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What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

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Q: Why didn't the blonde answer the call from her boyfriend? A: She had died in a rollover the day before.

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Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

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What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens have no sense of direction, he might have thought he was in wal-mart for all I care.

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Why is cancer a big thing? -It has grown after the diagnoses

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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did you know towels can cause dry skin?

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Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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What did the man with aids say? "I'm dying and there is nothing you can do about it"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your dog pooped on my lawn Now my violets are even more blue

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your mummas so ugley that it looks like it court fire and your family put it out with forkes

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Why can't Vampires go out in the sunlight? Because they don't exist.

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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Your Mum Is So Dumb, It Took Her 2 Hours To Watch 60 Minutes.

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A black man shoots some hoops. One of the bullets bounces off the rim and hits him in the eye. The man dies. His grandmother is still alive to attend his funeral.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? John.

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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