Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

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Why did god create anti-jokes? He didn't.

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What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

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What is worse than when the Titanic sunk? You Cannot say. You were on that ship.

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A man was feeling sick and decided to go and see a doctor. He saw the doctor and then went home. He wasn't feeling any better so he decided to get checked-out by the doctor.

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person 1:hello person 2:hello person 1:do you want to hear a joke ? person 2:yes person 1:good bye person 2:good bye

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What does the homosexual arab who plays football who has a best friend called Dave enjoy doing? Playing football.

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Whats funnier than 24 ? 25

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

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What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

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Why was the baby crying? Because she had a frog nailed to her face.

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

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I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

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my egg roll

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so you're waling through the desert and a tire falls off your canoe. How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

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Why are blondes so dumb? They aren't dumb they just have prejudice against them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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