How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

roses are red violets are blue i like movies get me a taco

Why do people laugh at the number 69? Honestly I don't know, its just a number isn't it?

A vodka please Sir this is McDonald's Ok sorry, a McVodka please

How do you not get disappointed at the ending for "Mass Effect 3"? Don't play the game, dumbass.

What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

An old man walks into a movie theater, has a stroke, and dies as his family screams for help and attempts to revive him to no avail.

a woman goes to an abortion clinic, kills a baby and still leaves pregnant.

what is brown and sticky? a stick.

What's worse then finding 10 babies in 1 trashcan? Finding 1 baby in 10 trashcans.

Guy One: Guess what? Guy Two: What? Guy One: I don't know, that's why I asked you.

THE GAME

We was all sat down at the table ready to eat then Gary must've said something to Lucy because she just burst into tears and left the table.

Yo mama's so ugly, she has difficulty attracting a partner.

Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

why was 14 scared of 15? 7-8-9

What's the best part of having sex with twenty eight year olds? They are of the legal age

How do you make a sandwich? Go into the kitchen and make a sandwich.

Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

Whats worse than losing your keys? Your entire family dying in a preventable house fire.

WOw you have no life

why is coltin alexander such a duche? because no one loves him

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To give to his wife to cut up for his family to have at a picnic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...