A man walks into a bar Ouch He broke his penis So he ate it Then he saw a little boy They shaved their pubic hair together He raped the little boy He walked into another bar Double ouch

Little Birdy: Are you my mother? Man: No, I'm a murderer. Get in the truck.

How would you rule?

Artichoke is a vegetable state induced by swallowing paint

Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

How many ADD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Wanna ride bikes?

What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

Sarah lost both arms in a car accident Knock knock Who's there? Not sarah. Roses are red Violets are blue Wow. Clever Knock knock Who's there? Still not Sarah, as she is in a serious condition at her local hospital, and so is fighting for her life.

Why did the bartender leave the bar? He worked really long hours and finally needed some time to sleep.

You know what's gay? Grabbing another man's penis.

What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

3 guys are walking in the woods there are 3 paths they each take a path. the first path lead to a shed that said blowjobs 25 cents the second path lead to the same place after they all made it threw the first guy said he got a blowjob so dose the second guy. the third guy said i made 50 cents

Q:What's red and crawls up your leg? A: A homesick abortion

your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

Q: If Alma have 4 corners..? A: Then there must be something wrong with Alma...

A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

What did the politician say to the other politician? We are both politicians.

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

What did the black man say when he waked into KFC? Can I use the restroom?

roses are red violets are blue i need a pee and so do u

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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