Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

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What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

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What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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Hey, guess what. What? ... Hello? Sorry, I don't talk to strangers.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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Q: What did the black man say to the sheriff? A: Good day, officer

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

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A white player in the NBA. Wait...

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Exactly what he had asked for because UNICEF do a wonderful job.

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If there are 50 bricks on an airplane, and 3 fall off, how many are left? It does not matter how many are left, however, the 3 falling bricks pose a serious safety threat and more should have occurred to properly secure the bricks from falling from the aircraft.

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What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

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An ant walks into a bar. Nobody Notices...

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Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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Whats black and white and read all over? A dead magpie.

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What's worse than burning a candle. Burning the bible. -Juanita

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Why doesn't your dad want to have sex with your mom? Because my penis is already in her vagina, thus your dad's inability to place his penis in her vagina.

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What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? The bench can support a family!

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When life gives you limes....... first you have some problem and second u throw them at people

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What did the math teacher get after he ate and he ate? A full stomach.

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What do you call an argument between a Jew and a German? World War 2

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What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

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man: hey whats that in the corner? Bartender: thatssteve his wife left him and he is trying to drown his saddness is addiction.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops