What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

your mom is so fat she is at high risk of a future heart attack and should be taken to a cardiologist

What's black and white and red all over? A domestically abused bi-racial woman.

who has a vagina, likes men , soundslike afive year old girl, has some sweet boobies and onlyhas one hair on his little vag? Robert sweeny

I see London, I see France... I see a Map.

What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

Why was the tree sad? Trees cannot think or move, and thus cannot feel emotions.

What's 9 + 10 19

What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shotgunned in the ass

Did you hear about the three Arabs that hijacked a plane? They drove it into the Pentagon.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Tourettes Kid. Touret- FUCK SHIT!

roses are red violets are blue my name is kate boyd im gay

Why did the Chicken cross the road? So it would not get hit

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

why did the man cross the rode? He didn't he got hit by a bus

Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

What kind of bee's make milk? Booobies!

how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

What did the cat say to the human? Nothing

Why was young Timmy Crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

Why didn't the guy have kids? He didn't want them

What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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