Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are baked until ready and then enjoyed be the person who made them.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats worst than getting bombed by the russians? The holocaust!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats worse than finding a worm in a apple? Getting raped by a skorpian

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A duck walks ino a bar...... f*ck this sh*t im going to candy land.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

WHY WAS 6 AFRAID OF 7? I REALLY DONT KNOW!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what's black, white, and red all over? a penguin stuck in a blending machine

thumb_up thumb_down -14

your mom was so fat that she died.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why don't you throw rocks at a black person riding a bike..... It could be yours

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats white jizz

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I found a new way to be condescending... Thats when you talk down to people.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What do you call an orange if it isn't orange? A: Nothing. Chances are you won't see it until it has ripened.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the one friend hate the other friend? Because the one friend didnt do a map for social studies he should've done and skipped school for that class and when he came back, the other friend told the social studies teacher he was here and he had to turn in an unfinished poster and now he is a crybaby bitch about it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the grandma stop baking cookies? Because she is an aging widow suffering from depression because her family seems to forget her existance as she barely lives day by day wilting in her 1 bedroom home.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I have an excuse why one leg and one arm ar shorter than the ather two. I was born sideways and pulled out by an arm and a leg, trust me im not stupid or gay... ASSSSSSSSSSSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..........................That was my turrets kickin in and i have dislexia if i didnt spell turrets right

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a man covered in bees? Nothing, you'll startle the bees!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -14

If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a speeding moped.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Two polar bears were sitting in a bathtub. One said to the other, "Could you pass the saop?". The other say, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?".

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops