What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

A man was feeling sick and decided to go and see a doctor. He saw the doctor and then went home. He wasn't feeling any better so he decided to get checked-out by the doctor.

What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

person 1:hello person 2:hello person 1:do you want to hear a joke ? person 2:yes person 1:good bye person 2:good bye

Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

What does the homosexual arab who plays football who has a best friend called Dave enjoy doing? Playing football.

What is worse than when the Titanic sunk? You Cannot say. You were on that ship.

if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

Why was the baby crying? Because she had a frog nailed to her face.

Where does Charlie Sheen Shop? Winners

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

You know what's funny? A well told joke

Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

Politics

What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

What do you call a man with ADHD ? A man with ADHD.

why is 6 afraid of 7? i don't know, ask 6

why did the chicken cross the road? to try and stop the rapist from sodomizing his young child but his atempts were futile as the rapist shot him and used his blood as lubricant when he skull-raped his dying wife

Me: Mike Mike: Yeah Me: The more you breath the more pissed off im getting.

whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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