What ever happened to Sally? We don't know she went missing over 5 years ago.

Q: A man, already drunk, walked into a bar. What did he say? A: Ouch!

If the covalent bonds of two Hydrogen atoms and one Oxygen atom creates water, which subs are currently on the 5-dollar-foot-long menu at Subway?

Why did the lamborghini drive off the cliff? Because the person driving was a fridge

How many hookers fit in your bed? 12, if you have a king-sized bed, and 8.7 if you have a queen-sized bed.

Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

What's worse than a car going backwards on the highway? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

What did one apple say to the other apple? -Nothing, apples can't talk

(In a job interview) Interviewer: Name a time when you've failed sometime Me: I failed an HIV test last June, anything else?

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

Jesus, Buddha and Mohamed walked into a bar and say: "There is as much validity in this fiction as in our collective works.

What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. ;)

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

A man watched his city burn. He was traumatized by the loss of his friends and family and went to therapy to recover.

Q: How do you tell a Jewish person that you love them? A: You tell them "I love you".

So a guy walks into a bar and says, "I can hold a spoon in between my butt-cheeks." Jillian Michaels asked him if that will help him lose weight.

Why didn't Joe want to stand up? Because he had no legs!

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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