Two men walk in to a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H20" The second man says "I'll have some H20, too." They both received glasses of water.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Wait what was I saying

What happens when Chuck Norris and Mr. T get into a car accident? They trade insurance information.

Q: A black man, A Mexican, And a Asian are in a car. Who Is Driving? A: The Cop.

Why did the fat kid rob a pizza shop? Because he happened to like pizza.

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

dont be afraid of lard squeezing cause really its just me teasing

What do you get when you stab Al with a sword? At

why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

What's worst than a holocaust 2 holocaust's

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

What did God say to the priest while he was masturbating.... ... God doesn't exist.

Whats the difference between a watermelon and babies I don't have a pile of dead watermelon in my basement

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. ;)

Three left giraffe testicles fell out of the sky and into a woman's grocery bag. "Did you know that 16 people die from dolphin rape every year? said Adolf Hitler as he began eating a horse.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house. knock knock..... who's there? the chicken

Roses are red, Violets are red, you are a liar, oh wait you're not!! MY BACKYARD'S ON FIRE

What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

What's the difference between a nutcracker and a can of tomato soup? Oh... I don't know, I was asking you.

How many skilled union workers does it take to change a light bulb? One.

What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...