two muffins are in an oven and one turns to the other and says,'' hey, it sure is hot in here''. and the other one says," holy crap, its a talking muffin!''

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A horse walks into a bar. "Rough day?" says the bartender. UUUNNNHHHHH!

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Did I invite you to my birthday party? No. Then why are you at my birthday party?

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i woke up in the middle of the night and my entire bed was wet... know what i did? i layed a towel down and went back to sleep

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Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

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A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

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ANTONI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q: What did the Rapist say to the Little girl before they got in to the Van? A: Get In the Van

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How do you teach another person's son to ride a bike? You don't. Let his real parents teach him to ride a bike.

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What smells like smoke, sounds like a pig, and looks like a horse? My mom's boyfriend

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

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how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

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What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

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How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by your great grandma

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Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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penis

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman come across a magic slide. They each decide to take a turn. The Irishman goes first, sliding down and shouting "GOLD!", and finding himself in a pile of gold as he reaches the bottom. The Englishman slides down screaming "SILVER!", and lands in a heap of silver at the bottom. The Scotsman takes his turn, and shouts "WEEEE!" as he slides down. He gets up and realises what a needless waste of a wish his enjoyment cost him.

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Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

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A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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