Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

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A dog walks into a bar. The owner got a fake service dog identification and everyone really enjoyed it.

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Why was the pirate not allowed into the movie? tickets were sold out

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What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

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has anybody else just skipped to the short ones

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Nah really, I start giggling like a dork whenever weird porn or whatever shows up on my computer, its just too weird. Fine ill use my glasses then, thanks for the comment by the way, I was really regretful for sending you that pic, but then again I did not have contacts then, nor did I want to photoshop anything.

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

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A buddhist,islamist and a prohibitionist walk into a bar.

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why did the kid fall off the swing? someone threw a fridge at him

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Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

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Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

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Robin Williams walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? To which Robin Williams replies, "Because I'm going to kill myself."

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Roses are red Violets are blue and oranges are orange nothing rhymes with orange

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What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

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"My dog doesn't have a nose" "How does it smell?" "It can't. It bled to death."

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Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

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Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

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(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

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What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops