What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

Lets just say I work for some important people, not the feds that is for sure, ill tell you when we meet, not here. As for my condition, lets just say that I am profusely bleeding noseblood now and that is because I forgot to take my medication, and if I had no medicaions at all, I would have begun bleeding out of me ears end eye sockets, and ironically id die from a lot of other shit before bleeding to death, so thats not even the case. Its nothing common, but I bet people could find out about it pretty fast on wikipedia, and as much as I like throwing shit on random people here, I dont like bothering anyone with my problems, in this case, it came kinda sudden and unexpected, and I dont mind sharing my deepest aspects including this with my best friends, of which one of them you clearly are love.

Whats in your pants, might get caught in your zipper and you may hold it all day. your pocket.

guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

Tim likes girls

whats worse than a dog biting you? two dogs biting you whats worse than that? the Holocaust whats worse than that three dog bites and one of them happens to have rabies

why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted to get to chicken to have safe sex

Q: How could the black man afford to buy a TV? A: He had a well-paying job and a supporting family.

Maths.

Roses Are Red...Rolo's Are Round....Pull Down Your Pants And Let's Down!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Q:a black man walks down the street with alot of light whats happaning he A:is it the parade of light

Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause Magic Johnson has AIDS

How can you tell the difference between a black man and a white man? Quite easily actually.

What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

How do you make a Child cry? Slaughter his dog and feed it to him convincing him its Chili

Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

Two penguins walk are in the bathtub and says "can you pass me the soap?" the other one looks at him quite quarly and says "what do you think i am, a chainsaw?!?"

Why didn't Suzie go to the park? She commited suicide 2 years ago.

Guess what Timmy got for Christmas, Nothing, Timmy has no parents, he's an orphan.

Why did the vagina smell so bad? Because it had yeast infection.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

If the Trojan Horse was a deadly deception, is it My Lethal Phony?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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