Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

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Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

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Ben: Something smells like updog. Jenny: What's updog? Ben: Nothin' much

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Internet Explorer

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What did the Jew say to the German? Yes I would like fries with that.

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What's similar about a black person and a white person? They're both black, apart from the white person

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Why did Jimmy lay down? Because he was tired

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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how do you make a blond girl cry? kill her family

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What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

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What's 9+10 Ebola

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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What did the oncologist say to his patient? You have terminal cancer.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

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How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

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A train poops its pants.

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Why do cats burp quietly, because they aren't men

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In Opposites Land, you might think the opposite of small is big. But no, it's nail clippers.

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CHORGLUND

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Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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Knock Knock? Come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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