What did the homeless man get for Christmas? I don't know, why don't you go ask him?

why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

Why did the black kid die? He had cancer.

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

Your mom is so stupid that her parents were probably ashamed of her low grades.

Why did Phil Krahn cross the road? Because he is gay

Q: Why didn't the blonde answer the call from her boyfriend? A: She had died in a rollover the day before.

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

Tell me you're a rapist. You're a rapist. This joke makes no sense. Mashed potatoes.

Bob Saget

What breaks when you give it to a baby? Its pelvis

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse becomes depressed. He didn't ask to look like this. He drinks himself into a stupor, and then crashes into another car on the highway on the way home, killing a family of five. The horse is now in jail for life.

A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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