What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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It's raining it's poring the old man died die to a sudden increase in blood pressure thus leading to a heart attack

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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my wife out of the kitchen

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how do you get a clown off a swing? hit him with an axe

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Hello, my name is John, and you are reading this paragraph. Find the mistake...

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Your mother is such a whore that she engages regularly in acts of consensual but unprotected sex with various gentlemen.

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Knock, Knock whos there? Jesus Jesus who? Jesus Christ

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A duck walks ino a bar...... f*ck this sh*t im going to candy land.

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What is a holocaust survivors favorite food nothing

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What's the difference between you and a polar bear? I don't hate the polar bear

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How much dirt is in a 4 by 6 by 8 hole? None its a hole.

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Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

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"Is this the Krusty Krab?" "Yes it is, how may I help you?"

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a woman gets hit by a motorcycle whose fault was it?......... the man's, he shouldn't have driven the motorcycle in the kitchen

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a nintendo wii.

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Joker: You wanna know how I got these scars Me: The Bat... Joker: The Batman!

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How many republicans does it take to change a lightbulb? CHANGE?????

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Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Repeat. Yeah.

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what is the biggest lie I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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