A man walks into a bar. He's black. Its 1962. He is immediately arrested.

Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

If youre African, why are you white?

How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

A man walks in to a bar. He then walks in to a different bar, and later that evening he goes into a different third bar. That man is a bar critique.

Why did the black person sit in the back of bus? All the other seats were taken.

Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was a really creepy movie

Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

What did the chicken say to the black guy? Nothing, humans and chickens can not communicate.

Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

Bob Saget

i was in bed with a girl recently and she said to me 'I want tonight to be magical', so afterwards i disappeared.

i remember when i was a child i wanted a skateboard but my parents would never buy me one so late one night i crept downstairs and got a hammer and some wood and i beat them to death my foster parents baught me 5 skateboards

What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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