A blind child sign is at the end of my street. I have never seen the child, but at least if he were to come outside at the right time period i might be able to spot him, whereas he would having no way of returning the gesture.

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Patient: Doctor Doctor! Every Time I Drink Some Tea, My Eye Is Really Sore! Doctor: Next Time Take The Spoon Out...

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there is nothing better than waking up to realise that your being hugged by your partner unless that partner is not home

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A monkey walks into a bar. Monkeys are always funny.

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What the the Tyrannosaurus say to the chicken? Dinosaurs are extinct and even if they were not, it would not say anything to a domestic fowl, it would most likely devour it with one bite.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from the farmer's field. The family were not too disheartened, as the rest were still contained.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

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A man walked in to a bar, he ordered a few drinks, met some new friends and had a good laugh with them. Later that night, he got in his car and drove home, which was foolish, as he should have known that being under the influence of alcohol increases the percentage of a collision, which could take his life and the lives of others. He arrived home just fine and got in to bed with his wife who was happy to see him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, it's impossible to determine the motivations of an animal that is incapable of speech.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call a black man in a hole? "sir". He is A colnel in the US marines fighting for his country in a pivotal battle to maintain american interests in other countries.

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Slug on ya tooth Gavin David Newman

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this new cologne, it's kind of gross smelling.

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when we're chased by bears.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Why did the mum scream at the boy? Because he was being stupid

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Besides the kama-sutra, what is the most popular sex position in India? 68 and 88. Moral: Mutation people... mutation... use your imagination.., Still gotta feel a bit of envy/admiration, it is known as the happiest nation of the world, with a happiness rate with a constant well over 80 percent, and that is FAR over any other nation.

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What do the Wii, PS3, and Xbox 360 all have in common? None of them will get you laid.

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So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

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What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away her Gameboy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Max

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why was the little boy crying? he wasnt, he died 2 weeks ago

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops