What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

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Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

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Vaginas are like? books. You stick your dick in them.

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Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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Andi: I have a great knock-knock joke, but you need to start it. Jake: Okay...Knock-knock! Andi: Who's there? Jake: ...

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What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

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why was the boy sad? he had a frog stapled to his face

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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Why was Susie's mom crying? Because Susie got hit by a bus

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whose. There? Not Susie.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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vitamin c

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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Christianity.

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Ben Corbishley

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Ben has 3 apples and Charlie has 2 apples, how many carrots can fit in my anus? Banana, because cows have 4 legs

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Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

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How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

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What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

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Knock knock Who's there Bill Bill who? Bill Thompson

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What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

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What do you call a Icelandic man? A guy who lives in a snowhouse with a elevator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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