why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

Trust me, you are that kind of girl, and no, you are not nerdy, you are open and down to ground, while your beautiful exterior means a lot to me (I am a man, its the way I am), I would never have wanted to talk to you or even less visit you with a pack (make it five packs) of condoms, if you where the awkward Asperger kind of gal, so how old are you, like seriously?

What is black, white, and red all over? something that just so happens to be seen by the color blind.

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

What's big and purple? Barney

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

How do you get a Mother out of a tree? Ask them to come down, because it is really not socially acceptable for a responsible adult to be climbing trees.

Why did the teacher give the little boy a golden star? He was a Jew and it was in Germany during the 1940's

Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

Wait! hundred billions!

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

Why did the Muslim kill a gay guy? Because the gay guy was threatening his family with a gun.

Why don't black people listen to country music Because every time they here hoe down the think there wife just got shot No sorry for anybody who's black I luv ya don't think twice I have thirty blk friends

A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

why do jews like weed? A) because they are used to being baked.

Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

What does the kid with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A: arms and legs

Why did the black guy stop drinking his kool-aid? He learned of its high sugar content and began to drink a glass of water as a healthier option.

What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

Q-if you are what you eat ,does that make you cannibal? A- yes

A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...