You can go out to eat without posting it on Facebook.

Why did the elephant paint his toenails orange? Because he wanted to hide in the pumpkin patch

how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

yo mama so fat, she got more chins than china town

roses are reddish voilets are blueish if it weren't for christmas we'd all be jewish

what do you call a professional gamer Their name

Why is Justin Bieber gay? Justin is attracted to the female gender

Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

when the zombie apocolypse comes what do you do? you die

What happens when cole goes into a dark room? It's not possible his hair puts off too much light

Q.what did god say when he made the first black person? A.oh shit i burnt it.

Q:Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? A: Neither did she

how fast does it take to kill a blonde? Give me a gun and i will find out

Why did the chicken cross the road? because he had legs.

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

Water? I hardly know her.

Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

Twas brillig and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe, all mimsy were the borogoves and the momeraths outgrabe

Why did the middle age man walk across the street? There were no vehicles currently driving on that particular road

it ain't easy being cheesy Max Harrison

What did the duck say to the other duck? Something, But us humans don't speak there language to understand

what's purple and plastic purple plastic

It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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