A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

Yo mama is so fat... she died due to type two diabetes.

Emily Walker.

I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

A baby seal walks into a bar... The bartender looks at it and says: too young.

Why didn't Susie do her reading homework? She is blind and her school system cannot Afford to teach her to read braille

Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

What's the easiest way to make new friends? With Play-Doh.

How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

What's 9 + 10 19

Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

Brother Bro-ther Broad her Soap

Yo mama so fat and ugly, I don't want to tell you how fat and ugly she is for fear of vomiting.

guy walks into a bar, ouch

Roses are red Violets are blue Just smoked some Meth nelnfjknfkjnwkejnkjnwefkjnKJNFKJRNFKWNEFEJNFJNWKEJNWFKEJFN

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry Show me your tits

Your face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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