Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a speeding moped.

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If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

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A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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Two polar bears were sitting in a bathtub. One said to the other, "Could you pass the saop?". The other say, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?".

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Q: What sound does a baby make when you put it in a blender? A: I don't know; I was too busy trying to find my camera.

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Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter... Actually I lied, girls go to the kitchen

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

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someone says they've been "dying laughing"... no they haven't; they're quite capable of still breathing and functioning in every day life.

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But officer, I did come to a full stop!

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What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

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How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

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Why did the little boy fall asleep? His parent pulled the plug.

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Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

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what do eagles and moles have in common? they both live underground except for the eagle!

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do you know what was a good idea? not last night

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Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

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What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? Being raped... What's worse than being raped? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two flies in your soup

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I forgot.

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justin bieber over spongebob *snicker*

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How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

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How can you make sure your friend wont die of cancer? Decapitate him

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What happened to to dyslexic giraffe that tripped over a brick. It got back up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops