Sprechen zie deutsche? nein!

Why did the Muslim kill a gay guy? Because the gay guy was threatening his family with a gun.

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

so the weather's nice...

yo mamma's so fat, when she jumped into the ocean, everyone yelled "tsunami!".

Knock-Knock Whos there? You You who? Yoohoo! is anybody home?!! Well obviously or i wouldn't have talked to you. Idiots these days!

"knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The SS, we heard you are smuggling jews in your attic, so you are coming with us."

Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

Ich bin nicht der Anführer

find the o 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duh its up top

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

What happened to the black guy that rammed his ankle against the bed frame? Yelled profusely until it stopped hurting.

That awkward moment when your brother goes to crack his neck, but he dies instead.

guess what im a bitch i have no balls and i can slap your mum in the face

(Knocks on Helen Keller's door) You: Knock knock Helen:....

Why was timmy having trouble with his homework? Because lobotomies were a forced practice in the 1950's.

K O O K A B U R R A . . . . . . . . . . ReTweet

How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

roses are red violets are blue, every 1 looks at you and call u a fool

why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

your mom is so fat.

Yo mama's so fat, I gave her a compliment because we should embrace body acceptance.

so a girl asks a guy: "if a tree falls in the forest, and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?" the guy responds: "trees dont grow in the kitchen, so you shouldnt be worried about it."

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? One holds groceries and the other molests little children.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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