why did the family have dinner? they were hungry and it was 6:00

What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

Why did little john fall off his bike? Somebody threw microwave oven at him.

Why did i try to write a funny joke? Cuz i was desperately bored.....

A man walks into a bar. He is a diabetic and promptly goes into a coma after drinking.

What do you do to a little boy who just called you fat? Throw a rhino at him!

What's the difference between a trampoline and a cat? I take mu cleats off when I jump on a trampoline.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's orange and sticky? An orange. What's red and sticky? My stool - is that normal?

An asian and white guy walk into a bar, the white man says to the asian "Do I know you from somewhere?" The asian says. "Yes, I used to go to college with you." The white man remebers him, and they catch up on life.

What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

A Jew, a Catholic, and an Aeithiest walk into a bar. The bartender look at them and says "Is this some kind of a joke?".

Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

Do u know where the glue is? nope, i just glued my hand to this table, so im no help to u

What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

How do you know when it's hot outside? When you walk oside and it's hot.

WTF? If you look at life from the right, you might just see whats left, and just then I looked down at the midget as he said "Yo whats up?" I told him, hey do you like left? He said! DAAAAAMN RIIIIIGHT! I spent a while just standing there wondering what the hell was happening into my life, it was so right it was left and wrong... NeroMetal (No fucking idea what Neronism is, I just play streetfighter V and type books that confuse people)

why are black people so good at sports? hard work and dedication

Roses are red, violets are blue, whoever met you is a BIG fool

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...