Scientists have discovered that the state of your hunger can affect what you say. For example, whether you choose to say ‘I’m hungry,’ or, ‘I’m not hungry,’ is based upon how hungry you are.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

When you nut and slice her fukcing dumb head off fucking dumb BITCH DIES

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Next up, Sharpi and Ryan take their audition faliure very seriously in "columbine high school musical"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do friends and trees have in common? If you hit them with an axe multiple times they fall over

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than a joke. ONE TOLD BY FOK.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's worse than 9/11? a dipped glass of milk

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +22

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a Black Man in the ocean? A scuba diver

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A kangaroo walks into a bar and says "Lipstick is the blood of all wounds." The bartender does not know how the kangaroo said this or why.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Mogok Papiti.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the clown go to the doctor? Because he had a malignant tumor on his liver.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the guy fail his driving test? He was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Your cat was in pain after after a stack of books suddenly fell on it. It's pain is extra-strong so you give it ExtraStrength Tylenol. Guess what happens next time? Nothing. It takes only 50mg to 60mg of Tylenol to poison a cat. 1 ExtraStrength Tylenol tablet is about 10 times that amount (500mg). You killed your cat. It's dead now and there is no "next time"..

thumb_up thumb_down +20

a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the Triceratops walk into a grocery store? To buy groceries

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops