"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

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What do you call a white duck? A quacker

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A blonde just got a call from her boyfriend. He said i'll meet you at your house, so the blonde drove home, excited. Once the blonde got home her boyfriend was having sex with another girl. The blonde burst into tears and pulled out her gun then stuck it to her head. " No dont do it!" her boyfriend said!...... the blonde, not knowing what to do next said, " Shut up you cheater you're next!"

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because a fridge hit him.

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Mamma why did the kids make fun of me today? I dont know.

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whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

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A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

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What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

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What's wet and sticky? I don't know, glue or something.

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what's worse than the holocaust? nothing.

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much... and after being married for 39 years... They get divorced

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What happens when Helen Keller plays badminton? She doesn't win because she threw out her back playing Ultimate Frisbee the weekend prior.

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why dont they make black forks

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Jose gutierrez is a gay fish.

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What’s funnier than cancer? Most things, really.

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Q. Why didn't bob go to work today? A. I killed his family.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? I don't eat pizza

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my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with its grandmother who just happened to live on the other side of the road because the doctor had said this could possibly be her last week.

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what do you call a gay ginger boy ? Ronan.

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Why did the computer load on facebook? Thats what you typed in.

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why did the chicken cross the road. to get to the other side. but it didnt. ROADKILL

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Knock Knock Who's there??? Your mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops