What did the apple say to the Banana? ....Nothing... fruit don't talk

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What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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What would happen if the whole world farted at once?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

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yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, 200 l.b.s

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Why can't the toucann fly anymore? Because they're extinct

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Yo mama so fat, she suffered a heart attack last week and we are all deeply concerned.

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Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

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what do you call white people running down a mountain? Avalanche What do you call black people running down a mountain? Jailbreak

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Sorry, I'm a poof.

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teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

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No just stuff on the internet when I get bored, like on facebook and stuff, why a nurse? Whats wrong? Is he ill?

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What s the difference between a pigeon ?

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roses are red violets are blue my name is kate boyd im gay

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Roses are red, Bacon is red, Poems are hard, Bacon

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A elephant drowns when it was swimming, why did this happen? Who cares its already dead!

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

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Yo momma is so stupid that the only test she passed was the mental retardation test.

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What happens when you mix a camel and a penguin? A cenguin!

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

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Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops