What do you get when ned puts toast in the toaster? A fucking massive sperm whale.

uh uh uh uh .... oh i swallowed my gum

Roses are red, My name is Dave, This joke is pointless, microwave.

Why did the guy fall into the ocean? He was surfing

Why was the woman blind? Because she couldn't see

I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

Jimmy is at a movie ? He's with a gay boy

I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

What do you get when you come across a duck and a moose? Nothing...What do you think you deserve a prize or something?

once upon a time joey was on a roller coaster. Joey fell off the roller coaster and died.

Why did the Japanese man fall down the stairs? He was blind and deaf and not aware of his surroundings to prevent himself from doing so.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes

Why is Osama dead? He got shot.

What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

Why was the little boys mom watching tv in the living room? Better question why is she out of the kitchen.

YOU-why did the airplane crash? (person): why? YOU-Because jimmy was flying it. (person): Who is jimmy? YOU- a fish.

Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

Knock knock ... Knock knock ... Little did the man knocking at the door know that the kid was told not to answer the door when he was home alone, so the kid was hiding

why cant women draw perfect circles? no one can becouse it is virtually impossible

Why was the Jewish holocaust bad? Because it's joke always end up on anti-jokes and millions of Jewish people where murdered in it.

What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

what did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? get down.

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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