A blonde just got a call from her boyfriend. He said i'll meet you at your house, so the blonde drove home, excited. Once the blonde got home her boyfriend was having sex with another girl. The blonde burst into tears and pulled out her gun then stuck it to her head. " No dont do it!" her boyfriend said!...... the blonde, not knowing what to do next said, " Shut up you cheater you're next!"

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What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

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roses are red violets are dead honey is yellow and so is head

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what did batman say to robyn before he got in the car?... "get in the car"

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An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

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what do you call a black guy falling down a hill? A hiker with an inconveniance you racist son of a bitch

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Three men are facing a firing squad. They are all promptly executed. Even if they were to escape by distracting the executioners, they would no doubt be shot down before they could get for.

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what is red with 2 legs? half a cat

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How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

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What did the transvestite say to the hypochondriac? "Ever been to Toledo?"

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Why does Joel get so many numbers from girls? Because he asks for them nicely.

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Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

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What did the mother say when the train hit her? Bad train! We don't hit!

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, I am pregnant and that's yo baby !

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Womens rights

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A rooster is standing on top of a pointed bird house. He lays an egg. Which side does the egg fall, the left or the right? I don't care, I'm a vegetarian.

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why did jenny get 22 turnovers in a basketball game? because jenny has down syndrome

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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These are some questions you should never ask on a first date: When you wipe do you throw your toilet tissue in the toilet or on a trash can? Do you smell your hands after you wipe? Do you you ever look down when you take a dump and see it come out? Have you ever picked your butt and then picked your nose with the same finger?

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What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

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What do the holocaust and new born babies have in common? Nothing. Except some babies are born in Germany.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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